Blessings

Waking to my six year old, limbs all woven into mine, curled and dreaming sweet.  

My big white dog, not so big as we imagined she'd get, soft and quiet, placing her paw on my knee.

A vast sweeping of new hardwoods everywhere I look, waiting for years of family and friends to make them a part of our home.

All of us safe, healthy, and full.

God's promises, prompting, involvement and continued guidance.

New steps to healing a year old heart break.

Breaking out and trusting Him.

Window views to a January outdoor that looks like Autumn, still. 

Rice milk

My dearest friends living right in my neighborhood.

Laundry day with good shows ready for me to iron to.

Homeschooling flexibility and our fresh start beginning today.

Humbling lessons around every corner.

God's patience and grace.

One more week until we begin Good Morning Girls: Ephesians.

The number of friends and family who chose to join in growing together in the Word.

This weekends wedding, alone.

What God reminded me on the spiral stairs down from the choir balcony, and the confirmation in the calendar around the corner.

Motivation and a sound season. 

Knowing I have so far to go, so much to learn, yet being okay with all of it.

Right here and now, AND the road ahead.  

More

A pretty kitty with soft paws that stay on

That same Kitty's new self-cleaning litter box

Stressless over having a torn up house

A cool basement to hang out in when we need to

A sweet and caring little niblet

Sari spending time with me today after school

A very kind floor installation guy

A Sami's bread order on my front step

Delicious gluten free brownies that taste "real"

Feeling healthy all day long for weeks

A good neighbor who calls

Peace

An unexpected number of Good Morning Girls

Being in love

Counting what Counts

I haven't found it from taking a pill. Not after a girls' night out or a deep house cleaning. I don't find it in a bottle or at the end of a fork. Not even in escaping far away in a good book or a morning massage. 

The only way I've been able to center myself with what is right and move forward with a better perspective has been to read God's Word and count what counts.  

Anytime that I stop and make an account of what is Good, I am changed for the better immediately. 

At the fresh starting place of this new year I am beginning again, to everyday live in gratitude to God for all that I have, in all things. 

Each week on Monday I'm going to sit down and type one of these lists here:

* aeropostale pajamas all day

* toys from one end of the house to the other

* the voices of my only child, his best friend, and our foreign exchange student all playing together

* fresh scentsy scents

* homeschool freedom and flexibility

* freshly purged and washed cabinets and fridge

* a happier, healthier, grain-free pug

* homemade cookies and ice cream

* laundry day and shows to watch for ironing

* pink cleated soft paws and no kitty surgery

* someone wonderful to dream with

* beautiful white snow covering dormant brown in waiting

* new and exciting beginnings

* God's provisions in ALL seasons of life

Writing What's Right

I kind of always thought I blogged during my best days and years because I was happy at those times. 

Looking back, I'm beginning to see that my most joyful times have been when I've focussed on the positive, been grateful about my blessings, and seen my life as something worth keeping. All things that happen when I blog.

Over the years, this has been more than a creative outlet, a documentation, or a way to share our life with my friends and family. It has been an accountability to being in the moment, making the most of everyday, listening for and to God's voice, being thankful, finding riches in the small things, remembering to remember, and proving to myself that there is goodness in each step of the way. 

I've been gone for awhile now. And I need to come back from where I've been.

I don't know where in me I'm going to find what it takes, but it is time to start again ~ to write down what's right, and let the wrong go unaccounted for.

even The Planet Keeper finds Rest

She said she could see it coming, "Three days. Three days of rest followed by something...  big". And I haven't stopped thinking of it since. Asking, wondering, dwelling on the meaning of rest.

God's Own brand of Rest. 

Zeek and I have been talking about it during school. The seven days of creation. One of them a full day of Rest declared Holy by The Maker of the universe. 

And we've talked about setting aside one of our seven days.

But where does a human find Rest?

How do we stop the train? 

Isn't it to honor Him that we dig, scrub, press, kneed, organize, feed, plan and keep? And shouldn't we stop, kneel, and offer all of this. Declare it all Holy? 

But where do three days come from the hands of a full time wife, mom, teacher, pet keeper, driver, chef, homemaker? 

Oh, but Who does Make my home? 

And Who Brings the Peace that we settle into?

And didn't He Create the entire planet? The Planet Keeper Himself.

If He can find Rest at the end of such Work... if He can find a moment to call it complete; to declare it all Holy, then why couldn't I?

He told the Israelites to collect enough manna only for the needs of their family each day. And those who tried to collect more were greeted with maggots in their surplus. But God allowed them to collect double on the sixth day in preparation of the Sabbath; the day of rest. 

So, the Israelites, who were in the desert and had a very real constant need for God's provisions, not only found His favor and miracles left and right, but even they were miraculously prepared for Rest. Plan ahead, gather double, and make way for the Sabbath. 

Aren't I in charge of what I do with my schedule? Couldn't I plan ahead each week? And if the task really is as insurmountable as it feels, then couldn't I allowed myself to completely rely on Him to part the waters and make His Way?  

Walking with Scripture

 The Lord is my Shepherd; I shall not want.

I have all that I need. 

He makes me to lie in green pastures.

He leads me beside the still waters.

He's providing the peace. Not me.

He's doing the leading. Not me.

He renews my strength.

...He said to me, "my grace is sufficient for you,

for my power is made perfect in weakness."

He guides me along right paths

bringing honor to His name.

Though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death

I will fear no evil...

For You are with me...

and if God is for us then who can be against us?

For I am convinced that not death or life,

not angels or demons, not present or future, or any powers,

not height or depth, or anything else in creation,

will be able to separate us from the love of God

that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Your rod and your staff they comfort me.

You prepare a feast before me in the presence of my enemies.

You honor me by anointing my head with oil.

My cups runs over.

Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life,

and I will live in the house of the Lord, forever. 

Psalm 23

Romans 8:38-39

Romans 38

2 Corinthians 2:9

More than my Salvation

It's been cold and stale in this room, where those months just before You're Light filled every edge and shone about countless gifts and blessings everywhere my eyes rested. 

My season shifted, and I took the change in stride. Who gets to have You so close, so effortlessly, continuously, forever? 

I kept my eye on You. My heart ready to jump in where ever You called. I bent my knee and raised my face to the sky everyday. I spoke Truths to the little one, and I placed my prayerful hand on the rise and fall of the chest who still tries to carry all our burdens. I crossed through this house proclaiming our cover. Dry as the words were of Your power.

I waited, and I didn't fill with guilt. I know the Spirit is like the wind, and who knows when or from where it will come and go? It is not for me to say or to earn, that I shall never boast. It is You who decides.

Until last night, I only asked for You to pull me in nearer again. I'm afraid of me without your peace. It is scary- what I am incapable of without you. 

The difference between me and me with You is astounding. You carry me. You lift me up and you take me right where I need to be. 

I love that. 

And last night I begged for it. I took into consideration that You love that too, and I pleaded for the Spirit to move in me again. 

And today You drew near. In random world-filled moments You initiated, and we spoke, and I saw. 

And tonight, after a day with family, bonding and hand holding, gift buying and laughter, I filled my Sentsys with new fall scents, turned the lights low and sat down to some Ann. Ann, who once filled me and then months ago all at once read like a foreign language... as if the wind had blown the summer door closed. I read her weekend prayer, and You took me here... and I heard You. 

And I looked up into this kitchen, holy temple turned hospital waiting room- and this time I saw it. That warm glow. That halo around everyplace I rested my eyes, again. 

I blinked and shook my face and opened wider. I looked around to the half-grown puppy who came new during the stale dry spell, and I even saw the light around her for the first time, ever. 

My heart quickened. I read and re-read Your invitation. I traced over the lines of every welcoming word. I breathed deep the promise that such a still hollow season has passed, and I took heed that this kind of gratefulness and worship is the same as anything with You... from You. not me. 

I answer yes. Always, and You know this. My lover, my guide, my counselor, my strength... dare I mention, friend. 

I pray that this time with you, this pouring in is long and uninterrupted. 

And I will rest in You, oh God.   

song reference: audrey assad, restless