Monday Blessings

* waking to this incredible house every morning

* remembering how it happened

* the woods out the windows, glowing with fresh white winter

* my family tucked sleeping, inside

* watching intently and keeping near our only son - our miracle

* a safe white dog 

* the hope of new growth in the fresh start of a transplanting

* my Mom's cookies in the cookie jar, actually made by my Mom

* my son's weekend of playing with Gra - ALL weekend

* a happier teen who is ready to do life

* a healing God who knows just what He is doing and has plans for me to prosper

* our GMG Ephesians study

* free worship

* homeschool flexibility

* Greg's job

* cold stone creamery strawberry cheese cake with reeses peanut butter cups

blessings

a crooked scentsy warmer

the streaks I never saw until today on the white cabinets made by the magic eraser over a week ago

the permanent sparkly blue nailpolish that exploded in the dryer last weekend, a continuous reminder of my J. Glynn

5 and 6am mornings at the neighbor's taking care of his hobby farm

that chewed up knobby little wooden dog brush I relinquished to my puppy when it was all she would chew

peanut butter fingerprints and puppy nose prints all over the lower half of my windows

a basement theater TORN APART and waiting for a second renovation wind

dreams of old wooden drawers filled with fresh grown grass on the mantel

Tina, on the counter, all chewed up by the cat who surely doesn't go on the counters in the night

a giant pile of mail, school notices, karate information, coupons, netflix, postcard reminders, etc...

the way that all these imperfections are a part of my beautiful life.

Sub Zero and Still Warm

On a morning like this, when it's -6 degrees, I do grumble inside a bit about having to go out to take care of my neighbor's animals. 

By now I should know better. I'm always so much more as I'm pulling out of that driveway than I was when I arrived. 

It's impossible not to notice and be warmed by it all:

*the little pieces of my friend's unique personality waiting inside the doors of his home

*the running shoes lined against the wall, the wood carved statue he moved from the front porch to the dinning room after I photographed it in silhouette, the piece of bark that looks just like a crow (I had to double check)...

*all six dogs waiting in the bedroom behind the gate that I know someone I love put up last night when they stopped over to tuck them all in

*five poolies running toward the back door to eat some fresh snow and go potty in the yard

*returning to the kitchen for some snuggle time with Chico until the others are ready to come back in

*the way they all look up at me and wait for their little treats

*saying "have a good morning!" to them, and "BEHAVE!" as I close them in to head out to the barn

*the way the snow glistens in rainbow colored glitter under sunlight - God's incredible artwork 

*how I anticipate that sweet chicken greeting as I slam my shoulder into the door to open it

*that crazy noise they make - I can never help but smile and imitate it every time I'm with them

*the young rooster gives me his own little developing "good morning", and I'm glad he thinks so, too

*so close, they don't worry one bit that I'll step on them... 

*I watch carefully and walk as slow as I can, apologizing when I feel a little toe under my shoe

*they will stick their heads in those feed bowls the second one grain hits the bottom- and then it's feed pouring all over their heads, and more smiles from me... goofs

*I can hear them, those sweet goats mah-ah-ah-ah-ing for me in the next room

*the smell of their sweet treat

*today, a chicken actually jumped in the bin when I opened it - they've been "cooped" for two days in this cold and they're getting a little wild

*petting the once skittish little cream colored female goat- I knew it wouldn't take long for her to get comfortable with humans living with her Daddy, Jeff, who likes to take the chickens in the house now and then

*checking the warm heaters that grumpy Kevin lovingly installed in each room yesterday- because of which the water isn't frozen today- whoo-hooo!

*whoever put that stanley hammer next to the door in the pole barn is my hero

*closing the door I yell, "have a good day sweet babies! I love you!" -wondering how many people would think it's insane 

*I mean it though- I love them

*I love knowing the people I'm collaborating with to take care of this place -they are family to me 

*and Jeff, running in Africa, who brings us all here, together, for him 

*the quick drive back to my house with the sun on my back reminds me just how easy it is, and how close we are, to love

Blessings

that the carcass looking meat in the snow by the front step turned out just to be a busted open pie pumpkin :)

the day after a day of rest

the work being finished

the mess cleaned up

the start of a good morning girls study of Ephesians

so many friends joining to read His Word each day

the first week of friday night vows

doing things God asks even when i don't really like it

the difference between chains and freedom

washing dishes and praying for a neighbor

knowing that our families are all eating the same cookies today

being in charge of my own schedule

short haired dogs

two weeks of mornings at the farm

my wee niblet

homeschool

science experiments and exploration

moving me to frame and find The Master's Peace

He is good if He does and good if He doesn't

"say it every single day... you never know when it's your last chance"

Blessings

Waking to my six year old, limbs all woven into mine, curled and dreaming sweet.  

My big white dog, not so big as we imagined she'd get, soft and quiet, placing her paw on my knee.

A vast sweeping of new hardwoods everywhere I look, waiting for years of family and friends to make them a part of our home.

All of us safe, healthy, and full.

God's promises, prompting, involvement and continued guidance.

New steps to healing a year old heart break.

Breaking out and trusting Him.

Window views to a January outdoor that looks like Autumn, still. 

Rice milk

My dearest friends living right in my neighborhood.

Laundry day with good shows ready for me to iron to.

Homeschooling flexibility and our fresh start beginning today.

Humbling lessons around every corner.

God's patience and grace.

One more week until we begin Good Morning Girls: Ephesians.

The number of friends and family who chose to join in growing together in the Word.

This weekends wedding, alone.

What God reminded me on the spiral stairs down from the choir balcony, and the confirmation in the calendar around the corner.

Motivation and a sound season. 

Knowing I have so far to go, so much to learn, yet being okay with all of it.

Right here and now, AND the road ahead.  

More

A pretty kitty with soft paws that stay on

That same Kitty's new self-cleaning litter box

Stressless over having a torn up house

A cool basement to hang out in when we need to

A sweet and caring little niblet

Sari spending time with me today after school

A very kind floor installation guy

A Sami's bread order on my front step

Delicious gluten free brownies that taste "real"

Feeling healthy all day long for weeks

A good neighbor who calls

Peace

An unexpected number of Good Morning Girls

Being in love

in gratitude for

• an early morning playdate with puppies 
• two boys' digging deep into a sandbox and their rekindled friendship 
• a meeting with an old school, straight shooting, high school coach
• God's unending love for his children
• stopping to turn around and hold a broken one 
• three days on the calendar for next week with my son's bff 
• the way his new sister makes him so happy and different- fulfilled
• google translate
• having her beside me in the kitchen
• teaching her to cook 
• fresh baby lemon-basil clippings for our stuffed manicotti 
• an early home husband
• pandora's paraguayan radio stations
• dim lit dinner for a family of four
• first pickles
• sugar cookies stacked with double berry cheesecake ice cream
• the beautiful hum of my maid servants; dishwasher, washing machine, and dryer
• pink and cream roses piled high from the weekend welcoming
• school things right around the corner
• the changing of life, into the unknown
• waiting for the unexpected
• knowing it will be grand again
• something i've never seen before 

Coming Back to Gratitude (sometimes i really do forget)

Fresh vegetables from a neighbor.
My 12 year old looking stick-like body, all in working order.

Pug nails, ticking.
One Sunflower filled with seeds and memories.

Having Time back.
Love songs to Him running through my always song stuck mind.
Hot morning coffee.

Baby gates.
The rare but always beautiful landing of a particular forever friend.

Home purging.
Pushing out to bring in.
Being almost there.

Seeing Him again.
A hot summer day poolside with my own son: an old longing dream fulfilled again.

Sundresses.
The way the light streams in.

Paper wings planted like morning kisses.

The recent discovery of a special place nearby.

This one and only. Always.

Thank You God, for all of this.

A Season of New Life

Today, I am grateful that God is so unyieldingly willing to take as much of the reigns 
as I can get my stubborn fists to loosen. 

When I let go, He tills the dead leftover of what grew in the previous season using it for good, strengthening and expanding my capacity to hold and retain things of value. As new life springs forth in a new season every sprouting seedling reflects the promise of more freedom in Him, sweeter fruit, and greater peace.

In gratitude today, for signs of new life peeking up from the enriched soil of a cold season:

~ New LIfe and their Kid's Club 

~ the women's night brewing out of the weekly hour at little gym

~ wisdom from a woman walking with the King

~ a quickly approaching vacation to be with my favorite woman ever

~ the energy bus

~ a YES place

~ the women in my life who are saying YES with me

~ my birthweek

~ God's faithful enduring constant awesomeness

Even with my eyes cast downward I find the most amazing testimonies of God's provision in all of life!

He is stronger than my worst day.

And praise God, I cannot stop HIm!

Join Ann, at a holy experience, where she guides, inspires, 
and hosts a beautiful, flourishing community of Gratitude Seekers. 

Gratitude Transformations

I've been meditating and really trying to dig in on the practice of living in gratitude. I've been curious to see just how far the blessing and joy of it might reach.

The stages have been like that of peeling away at an onion, going deeper - getting richer as it nears the core.

In the beginning it was one thing to count the obvious things I could be thankful for - the gifts and blessings abounding all around;

1. my God
2. my husband
3. my child
4. our home
5. health
6. love
7. faith...

After awhile that began to feel a little trite and even a bit smug. And I prayed for God's guidance - that I might grow further along in this exercise. 

I was quickly exposed to another layer beneath the surface that brought focus to a level of things I should have been grateful for but rarely considered in a day;

• lights
• water
• heat
• clothes
• hearing
• seeing
• walking
• breathing...

These things made me conscious of a broken hurting world living without the luxuries I was taking for granted everyday. And it brought burning edges brimming with remorse and tears.  

Then Ann's new book arrived, and One Thousand Gifts brought on questions about my intentions and purpose for jotting down thanks in this brown spiral-bound book each day.

Reading Ann's experiences caused my heart to widen and my vision to focus on seeking and finding the beauty of Him in the otherwise perceived mundane of which I'd previously passed by in oblivion;

• steady floating snow freckles closing space between sky and earth  
• cold wind sounding against the walls of my morning tucked in a marriage bed warm
• the steady ticking minute hand in early stillness
• feet and soul that obey Him
• streams of sunlight straight through eyes
• warmth on still young hands
• bright like His love
  

Then, last week Monday, I stumbled across Jenny, at A Minute Captured.

She didn't just write the things that she was grateful for. She wrote in between, in a tone of repentance, the things she complained about or begrudged during the week.

Her honest, humble, raw reflection made a connect in me. This is what I was doing "between the lines", only in my mind and never on paper. But to share it... this perspective didn't just make an account of His gifts, but could put a woman in check of her heart and attitude along the way.

And so Jenny brought me to consider giving thanks in the storms and even for the storms, as a means to an end for the in between flesh indulgences that the enemy feasts upon;

• the deserved cold snap of winter in my face and the reality of my choices
• a feeling heart to ache
• his healthy lungs blowing into his recorder at 6:45am
• his strong legs to stomp him up to his room for a time
• that they found my mom's heart problem
• repentant agony over hurting a sister
• God's faithfulness to me even in my ignorance
• that the trouble I'm in right now is not beyond God's will or power

I don't expect these layers to stop peeling away or for these transforming lessons to end soon. I want to take them all with me as I continue to give thanks in each of these different and valuable ways.  

Though I don't share in posts from my Gratitude Journal much anymore these Mondays, I slip in to quietly encourage and spur on the Thankfulness Journey, and to thank Ann for encouraging this movement. There is more to be discovered where ever He leads.

Following together,

Blessings.

Spirit to spirit to spirit

Knocking, I hear the barking of his dogs inside. Through the pain of glass in the door I see his familiar shape standing in the kitchen. Face down the hallway in my direction he smiles, permitting me to open and enter at my own risk. 

I wait in the entrance for him to quiet and corral the Pulis like I know only he can. 

I look him over... inside-out striped thermal top over t-shirt, sweat pants, socks and rubber shoes.

This is the first time I've seen him without a skull cap since his accident. 

I scan for scars of a head trauma that took his life last year, twice.  

But the only visible marks left are on the inside shining out. The kind of mark only our Creator and Healer can make. 

I remember being in his home for the first time. Taking care of the dogs while he was away, running. I remember God telling me to lay and pray. I cried joy as His love for this friend of mine washed over me... and the layers of intercession filled with whispers of a coming change through healing and refinement.

He turns to the table and returns with a gift in hand. A necklace he bought me from the top of a mountain someplace in Arizona. 

Not safe in a box. We are not either one of us tucked safely in boxes. 

Just fingers holding delicate strands of love and offerings from spirit to spirit to Spirit. 

Father God shines, lighting up the room.

And I look him over again... a man refining, healing. Changed.

My path has not been crossed so many times in so many ways by another. Not any ordinary coincidental happening. This is most definitely an ordained divinely sewn tapestry. 

We talk. Stirring the waters of God within, wading in the mainstream of His will for His children.

And I pray that his real scar, like mine -a religion that tells us we cannot come- will draw him to the scar of the One; a nail shaped covenant that bids us all, come.

We stand together in his living room. 
On the outside we are surrounded by gift boxes. On the inside there lay boxes we've crawled out of, wounded, to face the Maker - and we wait for the celebration of a God who cradled Himself a Son in flesh and manger - A God Who promises to cradle us and clear our path to wholeness and forever. 

The Christmas Gift in Christ is again extended, and I savor deep the Truth that God holds us in his fingers right now. 
Right where we are. 
Just as we are. 
Broken and healed, fallen and rising, hated and still finding love in what's left.

And to Him, through Him, because of Him we are... just right.